What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

If a female has XX chromosomes and a male has XY chromosomes, what chromosomes do transgenders have?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

How would you respond to Rep. Nancy Mace's claim that the GOP platform is more in line with what the American people want compared to the left?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

What do you think are the real reasons Matt Gaetz just withdrew his name for Attorney General in the upcoming Trump administration?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

How do I find a luxury service apartment in Gurgaon?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

My scammer is blackmailing me. If I don't pay 300 euros, he will send my intimate photos to my relatives. What should I do?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Make Nazis afraid again!

Why do flat-earth conspiracy theorists believe that photos from space, including those of satellites, are fake?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

During the Atlmark incident in 1940, the Brit war criminals violated Norwegian neutrality. Hitler could then justify invading Norway. Have the Brits ever apologized for violating Norwegian neutrality?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

TEXT:

Why is the US going after Canada after all? What is the reason for all this hostility?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Why do we exist, and why are we conscious?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Why do some women alter their faces by so-called cosmetic surgeries (on their eyes, cheeks, lips, chin, jaw) that making them look like Donald Duck or puffy aliens, while for most men these unnatural facial changes are ridiculous or even disgusting?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!